Saturday, 16 October 2010

Quick Re-Cap

A reminder of me "BEFORE"

In my previous entry, Shaheen had asked me some questions about my adventure. I thought it would be a good time to do a quick re-cap of what has been the story since I embarked on my journey in September 2009...

Commenced Phase 1 in September 2009

Starting Weight: 119.1kg

After 1 week: Lost 5kg

After 1 month: Lost 10kg

After 3 months: Lost 25kg

After 6 months: Lost 30kg

Then I started being naughty and blamed my circumstances, the things around me and blah blah blah because I suddenly couldn't stick to my eating plan. This went on for a period of 7 months. Then after deciding that enough was enough, I'm back on the eating plan. I am still on Phase 1 because I have not yet reached the target weight that was recommended to me by the doctors and personally I am not yet satisfied. I will only move on to Phase 2 of AWL when I have either (a) reached my target weight or (b) when I think that the weight I am is what I am comfortable with.

My exercise regime (then) consisted of a combination of dancing (3 times a week at least) and Bukit Shahbandar. I then incorporated yoga and more dancing. And now I am still dancing (4 times a week - about 11 hours in total) and an intense once a week session of yoga (maybe 2 if I have time).

So now that I have re-committed but fell off when I went to Tawau for the weekend, then re-committed plus a trip to Taiwan later this month (see how I do there!), my weight as of 16 October 2010 is... 83.2kg! A total weight loss of 35.9kg. I am so close to that goal of 79.1kg... and even then I probably will not be done yet!

I am now in the zone which I am not that familiar with! Let's see how I do by the end of this week!

Welcome to the Family!

This entry is dedicated to Shaheen (photo insert: L - Shaheen, C - Zana, R - Kath)who has recently signed up for Adventures in Weight Loss! Welcome Shaheen!

I have known Shaheen since we studied together at the International Islamic University Malaysia. We were introduced by a mutual friend, Adna and we just really hit it off!

I think for as far as I can remember and Shaheen can correct me on this one, we would talk about weight loss on a regular basis since we've known each other so this subject about healthy eating and working out are not unknown to us.

Since I started my adventure, Shaheen has been on her own adventure too, attempting to lose weight her own way. I admire her drive, commitment and dedication to following an extremely tough exercise training programme and at the same time, really be mindful of the food she consumes. In a nutshell - IT'S SERIOUSLY HARD WORK!

I received an email from her today which I can feel just breathes a big sigh of relief! Here's that email:

Shaheen Syed to me
1:52 PM (8 hours ago)

Dearest Rozana,

Today is my first day on the pharmanex supplements namely omega 3 and lifePax.  I am very excited to embark on this new method of loosing weight.
You know what excited me the most? The fact that I don't have to bust my butt doing high intensity workouts everyday and have sore muscles :)

I am going to do light weight training, cycling, walking and I am going to join the yoga group at my gym.  I'd love to join the belly dancing and other dancing groups too. Lets see what
my knee has to say about that!

Are you still on the supplements now that you are in your phase 2? How long were you in phase1? Did you loose all of your 32kg in phase 1 it self?
So many questions!  Okay, I'll also keep my self updated thru ur blog.  Take care and have a blessed day ahead!


Love and hugz,
Shaheen

She has a lot of questions which I will answer in another entry. At this stage, I would just like to share how happy I am that one of my best friends is going to have a life changing experience!

Thursday, 7 October 2010

A Conversation with Mio Ting

I love technology!

I get so much love and support and technology helped Mio Ting and I connect for a couple of minutes to discuss our progress.

I love you Mio Ting!

Here's our conversation over Gmail Chat:

4:00 PM me: hug hug
4:03 PM Ling: Hi dear.......today is the best day ever in our life!!
me: yay!
4:04 PM Ling: How r you?
me: good
:)

Ling: I just completed our CV6 with Nana. It's one of the best CV ever for me
4:05 PM me: great!
Ling: magical! r u going for brunei cv6?
Natalie and Lee will be attending
4:07 PM me: no i will be in jakarta with my parents :)
Ling: How's your progress in your adventure? I restart mine and setting a new goal weight for myself. Monday I breakthrough the weight that I have not see for almost 2 years, yeah!!
4:09 PM I am now at 56.8Kg (I have not see 56 for a long time) and targeting for 54kg as I wanted to see how I look at that weight.
me: i just re-started on monday :)
i was 89.1kg after all the hari raya eating
and then today i was 86.6kg
i am aiming for below 85kg before i go cv grad taiwan
i would like to go for 79.1kg
4:10 PM that would mean 40kg weight loss in total.
and i am curious to know what i look like below 80kg
4:11 PM Ling: Great!!! Give ourselves small target, may be 3kg per week. Another 3 weeks to CV grad Taiwan, that means another 9kg
me: is it really possible to lose 3kg in a week???
wah
Ling: You r truly an inspiration. 3kg is conservative figure.
4:12 PM me: really???
gosh.
ya i just updated my blog today
on how i felt and about what we talked about
phase 1 part 2

4:13 PM Ling: Your monday weight was 89.1kg and today is 86.6kg, that's a lot too
4:15 PM small target.........one step at a time. To me, it's a commitment to myself, just like doing mission possible. I will do MP no matter what because I am committed to capture the story of my life
me: :)
i was beating myself up actually.
for a lot of things.

4:18 PM Ling: Beating ourselves up only make things worse. I choose to accept my imperfection and choose to love myself with giving myself the best i can in food, in energy. I feel that this is the only choice
4:20 PM me: i decided to not pay attention to all those ppl who gone on to phase 2 and focus on my journey :)
no need to compare

4:23 PM Ling: Yeap!! No comparison. Everyone loss weight at different rate and we all grow at different pace too. Comparison is the ego that wanted to be better. You re doing great! Focus and appreciate the kgs that you drop off. That's amazing result........
me: :)
i have been in ego
:(
i realized that.

4:29 PM Ling: I see your commitment, your discipline, your determination, your confident, your inspiration, your unconditional love in the process. Keep going......this is a journey, the intention to have great health. The goal weight is just a guide, focus on the intention to be healthy
4:31 PM me: :)
thanks mio ting.

No Thank You...

I am super proud of myself.

Today the Empire Hotel Atrium lunch looked super yummy and I chose not to eat any of it! I watched my colleagues eat it all. I wished I was eating it with them but I didn't want to go through that Start-Stop pattern again. I ate my home cooked lunch and felt really good about myself!

I'm 86.1kg today! That's 3kg weight loss from Monday and 7kg more to go to my next target in which I will reward myself with another photo shoot.

Let's see how I do this weekend because I will be in Tawau for a speech contest and sizing up portions does not come so naturally nowadays. I wish myself all the best for the contest and for making the right food choices when I am away!

Photo Below: July 2010 with Abah & Mummy and my recognitions from the Brunei Speakers' Club. I recognize myself too for the super job I have been doing with regards to my adventure!

Wednesday, 6 October 2010

Dear People Who Don't Close the Door While They Change Their Clothes

I think she's talking about me! hehe!
http://thxthxthx.com/

Hope, Faith & Love

Shared by my beautiful friend Diwi on Facebook. I just needed to keep this message somewhere for me too... xoxox

Tidak, jodoh tiada ada berkaitan dengan keturunan.

Hanya belum sampai masanya.

Ia bagai menanti jambatan untuk ke seberang.

Kalau panjang jambatannya jauhlah perjalanan kita.

Ada org jodohnya cepat sebab jambatannya singkat.

 

Usia 25 tahun rasanya belumlah terlalu lewat.

Dan usia 35 tahun belum apa-apa kalau sepanjang usia itu telah digunakan untuk membina kecemerlangan.

Nyatakanlah perasaan dan keinginan anda itu dalam doa-doa lewat sembahyang.

Allah mendengar.

 

Wanita baik untuk lelaki yang baik, sebaliknya wanita jahat untuk lelaki yang jahat.

Biar lambat jodoh asalkan mendapat Mr Right dan biar seorang diri daripada menjadi mangsa lelaki yang tidak beriman kemudian nanti.

Memang kita mudah ter silap mentafsir kehidupan ini.

Kita selalu sangka, aku pasti bahagia kalau mendapat ini.

Hakikatnya, apabila kita benar-benar mendapat apa yang kita inginkan itu, ia juga datang bersama masalah.

 

Kita selalu melihat orang memandu kereta mewah dan terdetiklah di hati kita, bahagianya orang itu.

Hakikatnya apabila kita sendiri telah memiliki kereta mewah kita ditimpa pelbagai kerenah.

Tidak mustahil pula orang yang memandu kereta mewah (walaupun sebenarnya tak mewah) terpaksa membayar lebih tatkala berhenti untuk membeli durian di tepi jalan.

Orang lain membeli dengan harga biasa, dia terpaksa membayar berlipat ganda.

 

Ketika anda terperangkap dalam kesesakan jalan raya, motosikal mencelah-celah hingga mampu berada jauh di hadapan.

Anda pun mengeluh, alangkah baiknya kalau aku hanya menunggang sebuah motosikal seperti itu dan cepat sampai ke tempat yang dituju.

Padahal si penunggang motosikal mungkin sedang memikirkan bilakah dia akan memandu kereta di tengah-tengah bandar raya.

 

Bukan semua yang anda sangka membahagiakan itu benar-benar membahagiakan. 

Bahagianya mungkin ada tapi deritanya juga datang sama.

Semua benda, pasti ada baik buruknya.

Demikian juga perkahwinan.

 

Ia baik sebab ia dibenarkan oleh agama, sunnah Nabi, sebagai saluran yang betul untuk melepaskan shahwat di samping membina sahsiah dan sebagainya,

Tapi ia juga buruk sebab ramai org yang berkahwin hidupnya semakin tidak terurus.

Ramai orang menempah neraka sebaik sahaja melangkahkan kaki ke alam berumahtangga.

 

Bukankah dengan ijab dan kabul selain menghalalkan hubungan kelamin, tanggungjawab yang terpaksa dipikul juga turut banyak?

Bukankah apabila anda gagal melaksanakannya, anda membina dosa seterusnya jambatan ke neraka?

Berapa ramaikah yang menyesali perkahwinan masing2-masing padahal dahulunya mereka bermati-matian membina janji, memupuk cinta kasih malah ada yang sanggup berkorban apa sahaja asalkan segala impian menjadi nyata?

 

Jika tidak sanggup untuk bergelar isteri atau suami tidak usah berkahwin dulu.

Jika merasakan diri belum cukup ilmu untuk bergelar ibu ataupun ayah, belajarlah dulu.

Jika rasa-rasa belum bersedia untuk bersabar dengan kerenah anak-anak, carilah dulu kesabaran itu.

Jangan berkahwin dahulu sebab kenyataannya ramai yang tidak bersedia untuk melangkah tetapi telah melompat, akhirnya jatuh terjerumus dan tidak jumpa akar berpaut tatkala cuba mendaki naik.

 

Berkahwin itu indah dan nikmat bagi yang benar-benar mengerti tuntutannya.

Berkahwin itu menjanjikan pahala tidak putus-putus bagi yang menjadikannya gelanggang untuk mengukuhkan iman, mencintai Tuhan dan menjadikan syurga sebagai matlamat.

Berkahwin itu sempadan dari ketidaksempurnaan insan kepada kesempurnaan insan - bagi yang mengetahui rahsia-rahsianya.

Berkahwinlah anda demi Tuhan dan Nabi-Nya, bukan berkahwin kerana perasaan dan mengikut kebiasaan.

 

Jodoh usah terlalu dirisaukan, tiba masanya ia akan datang menjemput, namun perlu juga anda membuka lorong-lorongnya agar jemputan itu mudah sampai dan tidak terhalang

 

Cinta yang disemadikan tidak mungkin layu selagi adanya imbaskembali.

Hati yang remuk kembali kukuh selagi ketenangan dikecapi.

Jiwa yang pasrah bertukar haluan selagi esok masih ada.

Parut yang lama pastikan sembuh selagi iman terselit didada

 

"Kadang-kadang Allah sembunyikan matahari, Dia datangkan petir dan kilat, Kita menangis dan bertertanya-tanya, kemana hilangnya sinar? Rupa-rupanya Allah nak hadiahkan kita pelangi..."


Have Faith in Allah, 
Have Hope in Dreams,
Have Love in Life

Tuesday, 5 October 2010

Re-Commit: Phase 1 Part 2

I have been on a 7 month “holiday” from Phase 1. How do you define a holiday while on this adventure? It means you:

1.       Let loose and have many mad moments OR

2.       Sort of follow the eating plan throughout the week and allow for little “treats” on the side OR

3.       Follow the eating plan Monday to Friday and then when it hits the weekend, you let loose and have many mad moments.

I think mine was a combination of all 3! I became aware I was going through a very familiar pattern of mine which was that of START and STOP. I was struggling to START and when I did START, I then STOPPED not long after, then I had to RE-START and the pattern would go on and on. I admit that when I made the choice to allow myself to eat this and that, I have now found it difficult to really stick to my guns. As a result of the choices I made after Hari Raya, I have put on weight and as of Monday 4 October 2010, my weight came in at 89.1kg.

I admit I went through a period of self-loathing because I was not disciplined as I have been before which was then salvaged with thoughts and reminders of me that I have come so far, how could I not like myself for what I have done? Then I had feelings of fear. I felt fearful about going back to the weight I had started with when I began this adventure. I had fear about being that big, fat girl again who struggled each time she climbed up the stairs or the seat was too small. That was salvaged with reminders from friends that it was up to me to not make that happen again and keep on staying motivated.

On Sunday night, after my last open house for Hari Raya and after a weekend of enjoying delicious food while on a short trip in Kuala Lumpur, I had decided enough was enough. It was time to get serious again. I could visualize me being 10kg lighter but there’s no point visualizing if I didn’t take any action. I am very proud of myself that my decision to re-commit to Phase 1 was not based on fear. It was based on the belief in me that I am capable of achieving my goal and that I deserve this beautiful and healthy body.

Come Monday morning, I was ready once again. I feel so proud of myself for saying NO to the offerings that have come my way. And I feel extremely encouraged now 3 days into my re-commitment my weight has come down from 89.1kg to now 86.6kg. I am back on track!

To all of you out there - my pillars of strength: Thank you once again for the never ending support and encouragement.