Strategically Thinking About Relationships

This was another article that Amy shared with me that she got from RBA's Muhibah's magazine. They interviewed Chin-Ning Chu who wrote the the book The Art of War for Women - Sun Tzu's Ancient Strategies and Wisdoms for Winning at Work and she shared how 'strategic thinking' can be applied in our day-to-day lives. In her example, she shared about a relationship between a man and a woman.

Tao - Moral Standing and Motivation - How to make winning decisions.
"You look at this relationship and ask if it's right for you. Does the individual bring out the best in you? Does she/he have the education/intelligence that can stimulate you to your fullest potential? What can you contribute to enhance him/her and vice versa?

Tien - Timing or when to do what - timing lets you know which way to decide
"People get married because it's the time to do so and not because they've found the right person. This is especially true among Asians. I know of a friend who got hitched just because his father demanded he get married before moving to the US for further studies. So his wife entered into his life during this period and thus began a long and torturous life for him."

Di - Earth, terrain or resources. Di refers to the obstacles you face on the journey to a successful project. Di also includes the distances you need to travel to accomplish your goals.
"You have to exercise the financial and emotional resources to determine whether your potential partner is the right match for you. If you aren't emotionally rich, while your partner is emotionally needy, you'll be totally drained by the end of it. If you are not financially resourceful but your partner enjoys spending your money, your wedded bliss won't last long."

Jiang - Leadership - a leader must be wise, trustful, benevolent, courageous and strict
"In your everyday life, you are the leader for yourself. It is up to you to incorporate and examine the other elements of strategic thinking and to bring forth the proper vision and the plan of action."

Fa - Method or how to
"If you have determined that your present partner matches your strategic vision, you can proceed to pursue the said person and win them over. However, this doesn't mean that you blindly chase the person. Master Sun says "Know thyself and know thy opponents.: By knowing your lover's characteristics, background history and the events that contributed to his/her personality, you'll be able to determine how to act, react and interact with them."